.x.insanity is the only cure|open

[Phaedra]

Sometimes feeling the pain and the sorrow was the only way she could ever really enjoy the freedom and bliss of just being with others who didn't seek to destroy her mental and physical state. And that's how it was now. She was wearing the summer school uniform, the short skirt rising high on her thighs, the tan legs riddled with little, almost unnoticable scars visible from knee up to the navy blue skirt. She felt uncomfortable in her clothes, but she sighed and quit wiggling around. Today was her first day at the institution and she really didn't want to seem like a whiner. Phaedra was just one of those people who shut up and just dealt with things...today would be no different. Being in a room with other people made her nervous.

She realized that it was pointless, but the emotional condition of said girl...not so well. Biting her bottom lip, silver eyes framed by naturally thick, long black lashes darted here and there, as if she was some criminal. Her hands had been clenching the sides of the wooden desk, understandably, and that's when she smelled something woody burning. Burning? Wood? With a mind as accurate as clock-work, Phae looked down, her heavy black tresses swishing about her shoulders. "AH!" She gave a yelp and released the desk. Her hands had somehow produced fire and the imprints of her hands, skin prints and all, were burned into the desk, the edges of the image charred black. The parts of the desk that were burned, the sides, were rather feeble now.

Wide, scared eyes sought to look at the teacher and immediately an apology sprang to her lips as angry, frustrated tears trickled from her eyes. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it! I didn't even know it was happening until it was too late!" Phae swallowed the bitter resentment building up in her throat. she wiped her tears away from her face, not at all worried about her make-up; she didn't wear any for exactly this reason.

[Nether]

The lesson was just starting, people barely having filled the room, and something was amiss already.

"Excellent." He thought to himself. "Five seconds past calling the roll, and there is already trouble. I knew I should have taken up a more relaxing employment offer. Demon hunting, maybe?"

None of his thoughts transpired as he fiddled with papers on his desk, apparently getting ready for the lesson but in truth scanning the room,trying to pinpoint the source of his sensation. Play with magic long enough, and you'll just feel it when someone is messing with the laws of the universe. Especially if it's not a willing thing.

A faint trail of smoke, a fidgeting, nervous looking girl and the first hints of burnt wood. He had a winner. Apparently, no one had noticed yet, but it was only a matter of seconds. Closing his eyes to help concentration, he tried to remember who that girl was. "Phaedra Smith, 17, from the US. Not a perfect psychological evaluation, but nothing bad enough to give me all the details. Trust issues have been mentioned, as well as a rather severe case of androphobia.. and of course, she instinctually controlled fire. Troublesome." Adding a mental note to put forth an order for fireproof furniture, he waited for the inevitable with an imperceptible nod.

Three.. Two.. One..

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it! I didn't even know it was happening until it was too late!"

Without missing a beat, the Nil rose to his feet, clapping his hands once to focus on himself the attention of the class, the hint of a smirk appearing for a second on his thin lips.

"Excellent. Thank you, miss Smith, for helping me introduce today's topic: control.. I'm sure your little display definitely managed to get us more attention than I could ever have with any normal introduction. Don't worry, nobody liked that desk anyway. Now, before we start.. anyone else needs fireproof ones, for the future?"

Well, after all control was already going to be today's topic. Now he only had to hope the girl was quick enough to catch on to his hints, and act like it was all a planned act. He really, really didn't need an out of control pyromancer on his hands in the first days.
"Let's only hope my little speech managed to get her enough time to put on a believable mask.."

[Phaedra]

What a joke. Talking about the girl here. What. A. Joke. First day in a new school where she was already months behind everyone else, and she'll be the laughing stock of the school because of her...oddities. Well, hell. It was April. The school year started in January; meaning that she was four months behind. And going by her own will, four months could be the difference between mastery and unavoidable explosions. Sighing, she looked up at Professor Nil under her lashes, mumbling several profanities I purposely fail to mention. He was helping her and mocking her at the same time. What talent. Phaedra sighed in reply and looked at the few classmates that were near her. "What can I say, Nil, I do what I can."

With a small smirk of her own, she turned her attention back to her desk. Then, a thought hit her: Did I really just say that? Oh, hell no. Where'd that spark of rebellion come from? DID I REALLY JUST SAY THAT?! Oh, gosh. This was going to be a very interesting chapter in her life. Had someone been looking at Phaedra, they would've seen a girl who's silver eyes were foggy, clouded, with some distant memory or active thought. She had been on her own, taking care of herself for two years. Two years, she'd been making fake residencies, faulty I.D.'s, and other lies. Two years, she'd been working hard to get to this place. And two years, she had talked to no one unless she'd had to. Perhaps being away from Linda and Jarren and the death of Granny Dot had changed her more than she thought.

Because she had just said the first thing that came to her mind. And another surprise: she was still stewing with anger. Mostly towards herself. But then at others. Where'd the nervousness gone? Wherever it went, Phae did not miss it. The ever working mind of hers picked up some other thread of concept. What if she was about to go into a beast-fit? She never knew when they were coming, and she had put in a subtle warning in her application about tranquilizing her, tying her down, restraining her however they saw fit. She did not wish to see people die again. This paled her face and the usual deep, golden tan of her face took on a white palor that made her look sickly. With those darting -once again- nervous eyes, she looked at the teacher, trying to zone in on his lecture. Maybe she could distract herself from it.

[Nether]

Nil cocked one eyebrow, a mildly amused expression crossing his pale features at her words: he didn't really care about this sort of formalities, but appearances had to be saved.. at least a bit.
"Yes, I'm sure we'll become great friends soon, miss Smith.. but for now, feel free to leave 'professor' in front of my name."
He kept his attention focused on the girl as he moved in front of his desk, standing in front of the class.
Crisis averted for the time being.. though to be honest, he didn't know if things were safe yet.

Her profile did say something else in the dreaded small print, after all.. another power, maybe.. or maybe just a personality disorder, triggered by anger.. and the girl seemed to be seething with that, for one reason or another. He could go with an attempt to calm her, but with his empathy.. and his gender.. things risked getting much worse much quicker.

For an instant, he toyed with the notion of just clouding her mind with magic, putting her to sleep, maybe.. but his contract was quite clear on the matter of using spells on the students: it was to be only for teaching or dire necessity. And things weren't out of hand yet, he was confident in his ability to restrain her if things took a turn for the worse. "Just what's with political correctness these days? Can't they just add clear notes at the bottom of profiles? Something simple, like 'Warning: Demon Prince of Slaughter bound inside. Take caution with holy symbols, black goats and ancient Sumerian curses'"

The whispered words and surprised explanations from the rest of the class were starting to disappear, and curious eyes were starting to focus on him. As for the girl, she was apparently still trying to decide if it was better to be angry or to be nervous. Better to start with the lesson: with some luck, it would distract her enough to pull through another hour.
Where was a psychiatrist when he needed one?

"So, as I was saying.. control. Control is something you're never really going to have too much of. And I'm not speaking only of the ones among you whose powers are triggered by intense emotions." At this, his eyes darted back to Phaedra, checking how she was coping before going on."I'm not telling you to become unfeeling machines, but allowing yourself to be controlled by emotions too strong is going to spell disaster. For yourselves and whoever's standing close at the time. It's probably easier with an example. Can anyone tell me the difference between 'fear' and 'panic'? ..or 'anger' and 'rage'.."

[Phaedra]

She genuinely wasn't stupid. Not in any sense of the word. She wasn't even near antisocial anymore. When people came up to her, her face lit up with a warm smile and she happily introduced herself. Even being in a normal classroom with normal subjects taught wasn't a problem. Phaedra had never been one for being introverted. She was a born extrovert, though that had been seriously hindered by Jarren's hold on her life. But being in a classroom dealing with powers that were not marked normal or even minutely controlled disturbed Phae on a level that she nor anyone else could not even begin to convey in words. She was used to being on top in work. That was the reason she wasn't behind in her "normal" subjects, like maths and such. For an eighth grader, she had been taking several classes for high school students. Therefore, two years later, she was right where she should be.

And being behind, putting her in a situation where she'd not had experience before made her, well, nervous. Simply enough? That coupled with the anger and frustration she felt everyday. But she got an inkling of something good out of her emotions: when she was extremely angry, or happy, or frustrated, on the extreme side of an emotion, she could control the little things of her pyromancy. She could actually control when the flame will appear, where it will appear, how big it will be, and at what part of her body it will sprout from. Thus, her entire being, except for accessories, clothes, etc., were fireproof. And not only could she control her own flames (which were a deep blue by the way), but she could control the fire of any other thing. If it was inspired by fire or a man-induced fire, she could still control it.

She was still marvelling at her own abilities. Vanity? Heck no. Wonderment? Heck yes. But her sub-conscious kicked in and snapped her out of her trance. The distraction had calmed the anger in her. She felt normal now. Not even nervous. Crossing those shapely legs of hers, she looked around. Everynow and then she would catch a classmate throw her a nervous glance or a faintly worried one or even an openly curious one. She did her best to keep that smile on her face. But eventually, it did fade. She heaved a small sigh. This was going to be a long day. She caught the ends of Professor Nil's speech. Her bright eyes looked around. No one answered. No one even bothered to answer. Phaedra thought back. He was talking about control. She had heard the last part of the sentence, the bit about difference, fear and panic, anger and rage.

She didn't have to hear the question. She was smart enough. She figured it out. She raised her hand and then spoke, that voice heard clear as a bell. "Well, Professor Nil... fear is just an emotion and umbrellas a large range of actions and feelings. Very general. Panic is more specific. Panic is the feeling of uncontrollable fear which might very well induce horrible results. It's when one feels they cannot control what will happen to them. Anger...anger works the same way. Anger is a very broad concept of things: the heated emotion. Rage underlies anger in the means that it is brought to light by it, and it too is usually used to represent the unmanageable, unrepressible side of so dubbed, 'anger'. Clear enough for you...Professor."

At the end of her clearly precise answer, Phaedra raised her eyebrows at the man of a rather stark handsomeness that was her teacher. Normal for Phaedra was politeness with a temperatured touch. She was, afterall inclined to have a bit of spitfire. How ironic, is it not?

[Nether]

"Yes. A perfect, textbook definition, miss Smith.." He answered, not failing to notice the sarcastic accent placed on his title, and deciding it was enough of an improvement to not need an extra mention "..Even though I doubt you actually followed my speech at all." He added, even if only in his mind.

Crossing his arms in front of his chest, he leant slightly against his desk "Indeed, there are many shades of every emotion, and that is.. quite obvious, if you just think about it a little. Fear, by itself, isn't dangerous: it sharpens the senses, focuses the mind and improves reflexes. But add too much, and you'll fall into panic. You'll lose control, you'll fail to properly evaluate a situation, you'll tap into a power and find out it doesn't respond as you expected it to. And guess what? You panic more, spiraling lower and lower. Do it here, and I'll stop you, one way or another."

The last word was said so coldly that it almost froze the air through which it travelled. There was no need to mention threats: brutal efficiency and a swift resolution were simply promises, facts. After all, part of his work was to protect the students here, with "as little bloodshed as possible".. but the lesser evil wasn't always actually good.

"Do it outside.." he continued, after a brief pause "..and you'll actually wish someone stopped you here. Always assume that failure in controlling yourself will trigger the worst possible result. Someone here probably experienced this already, some others not, but I'll say it bluntly, since there is no room for misunderstanding here: people die when someone like us loses control.
Usually, horribly painful deaths.
It might not happen the first time, or even the second, lulling you in a false sense of security as you allow your power to control you. Who knows, for a couple of times it might even give you better than average results.. but those are going to be pyrrhic victories. In time, you'll pay the price."

For a second, he wondered how many of his students actually knew the meaning of a pyrrhic victory, then he mentally shrugged. They had history teachers for that sort of stuff, and the rest of the lesson made the point quite clearly even without understanding the specific reference.

He closed his eyes for a second, then started talking again. "I know there is still a lot of time, but I'm done with the explanation.. not that there was much explaining required on the matter. For the rest of the lesson, you're free to ask whatever question you might have on the topic. Other than that, I don't want to hear a single whisper: everyone of you will start thinking of an easy mental exercise, from counting sheep to mentally calculating progressive Pi values, that will help them focus.

In time, this exercise will have to become your mantra, an instinctual safety net for when you'll feel yourself washed away by emotions; for now, it will simply be something boring to do.. just like any other homework. If you want extra incentive, I'll let you know that it also works as a weak form of defense against mental probing. Nothing to get too excited about, but every bit helps."

Moving to sit back in his chair, he adjusted his glasses, his eyes scanning the classroom once more, waiting for questions before moving back to paperwork.

[Phaedra]

Phaedra listened to the rest of his lecture, or tried to. But images were flashing through her mind at his words. The cold tone had caught her attention. And she was really listening now. At the bit about students having had maniac experiences already, Phaedra locked up. A big sweat drop rolled off her brow out of nowhere. She was seeing the day she left Mississippi forever, the day she killed Jarren and the neighbors and who knew what else she'd done to them. She certainly couldn't remember. All this time, she had broke out into a cold sweat and her face had grown paler, sickly appearing. Phae was fading in and out of the short lecture, her feelings spiralling out of control. And then it hit her. In the back of her head. It started at the base of her skull, the back-breaking throbbing that would soon consume her body.

She gasped and started to hyperventilate. Speaking through her teeth, she blurted out a question. She hoped to distract herself as quickly as possible. With shaking hands, she once again clutched the desk, her hands sliding into the perfect imprint of her fingered appendages. "Professor Nil! What--what if the only way you can really control your power is if you feel the intense side of your emotions -like panic or rage or-" She was cut off by the new bout of sharper, extreme pain. She clutched her head and fell into the floor, a shrill scream escaping her mouth. She convulsed on the floor and one could swear there was the popping of joints and bones moving, rearranging, finding they have no purpose in motion, and then moving back to their normal positions. Her mind felt dark and blurry with pain, as if something far strong and vaster than her was poking her mental.

This thing she dubbed "beastality" was taking over her mind frame and the x-factor cells in her blood and nervous system were clutching onto the lesser cells, which would include all of those in her body besides the x-factor ones, and dominating for the time period until they dissolved and the fit ended. After a few more seconds, everything stopped, and only silence came from the young woman. Then, suddenly the body stood up, as if Phae was some sort of marionette and someone was pulling her strings taut. Her eyes were closed and the eyeballs behind them were completely still. But then, all of a sudden, they snapped open, revealing the fully onyx eyes behind them, no iris, no white...only pupil.

She cocked her head to the side, and suddenly, it was made clear that this was not Phaedra, only the animal version of her. Her long tan fingers became claws and her lips pulled back to reveal teeth that looked sharper than they did moments before. Seeing the professor, she let loose a rippling snarl/howl that sounded most definitely inhuman. And with that supernatural speed, she launched herself into the air.

[Nether]

"Professor Nil! What--what if the only way you can really control your power is if you feel the intense side of your emotions -like panic or rage or-"

"Then, your best hope is a quick, painless death." He wanted to answer, but bit his tongue before blurting it out. He had promised himself he wouldn't directly threaten the lives of his students during at least the first week of work, and planned on respecting that.

Besides, the girl seemed quite strange as she asked her question. Perhaps it was better to send her off to see the nurse? But no.. something wasn't being right, just like earlier with the accidental fire, a shivering, cold sensation of anticipation running down the man's back.
She wasn't about to set his class on fire, was she?

He barely had the time to once again lift himself from the chair that.. something.. started happening to the girl. He stared at her wide eyed, confused for an instant: her body seemed to be changing, muscles and bone moving around to form something different.. it looked quite painful.
So, apparently it wasn't something as simple as a personality disorder.
Intriguing.

He narrowed his eyes as he stared at her standing up, allowing himself a grin full of curiosity. He began uttering a word with too many consonants to be from any normal language, and his hands moved following instinct alone, beginning to trace a pattern in the air.. a pattern he had to make a conscious effort to stop, forcing a slight change.
Restrain and disable, not kill.
An harder kind of fight, but he welcomed challenges.

Watching her leap into the air, his amused smirk got wider as the shadows of the room got a shade darker, liquid, everchanging shapes that followed every hint of movement.
Words were whispered, apparently reaching directly the brains of the shocked students without bothering to move through the air.
"Class.. dismissed."

[Phaedra]

It's not like she was in her mind. This beastality had completely taken over. Phaedra was locked away somewhere far within the recesses of her mind, and she had no control. Sad as it was, during this so called "fits" she was almost non-existent. Like now. The creature in Phaedra's body was suddenly restrained in midair and with no more momentum left in her attack, she fell all 10 feet back to the tiled floor landing with a sick thud. Her head was cracked open, and a hot, sticky crimson liquid began to puddle onto the floor. But even with her injury, she tried to get up. When she couldn't, she began to wiggle around violently, snap her teeth, and make the most ungodly sounds, all while, the pool of blood was getting bigger. Sad. Her new uniform was completely covered in blood on the front. This went on for several minutes when suddenly, she stopped moving, the sensations of the shuffling feet of the dismissed teens lost to her. She was out for a few moments but then her silver eyes returned, dazed and confused. She felt the pain in her head, but she didn't remember how it got there. Or why it was there.

She could get up. She shifted her head a little bit, and her vision exploded into stars. "Oh..." She was left looking up at her teacher, and even her fuddled mind figured out what happened. "So-rry Professor Nil." And then Phae was out.